Three weeks ago today I had my last Herceptin treatment. For the last year, every third Thursday was the day I went into the chemo ward. Here I am – on this Thursday – feeling strange. It has been my norm to be in hospital and here I am at home contemplating being cancer free.
My Oncologist told me that I am cancer-free. These are huge words. In April last year when I was feeling very healthy, I was told that I had breast cancer and here I am in August 2012, feeling a bit weary, and I am cancer free. Cancer seems so arbitrary and like a trick sometimes, especially as much of it is invisible.
Don’t get me wrong. I welcome being told that I am cancer free. I prefer my life to be this way. But my mind is a bit institutionalised, used to planning things around hospital appointments.
However, after three weeks of feeling a bit indifferent about being cancer free, I am starting to feel quite optimistic and interested in life to come.
But focusing on right here, right now, I’m starting a few new endeavours. The first, is working with a reputable herbalist to compliment other therapies. I’ve always followed conventional plus complimentary therapies (but some complimentary therapies e.g. some herbs should not be mixed with chemo medications). So tomorrow, I have my first appointment with Robert Newby and the focus will be on headaches/migraines and side effects of the cancer medications.
I am still experiencing lots of headaches and migraines but they are very boring. I tried another headache prevention medication but I felt like a zombie so no thanks. It’s best to stick to a bit of voltarin and an anti nausea medication during the migraine…. But when I’m not headachey, I am feeling quite good.
I have been doing EFT to get to the cause of the migraines and even though, half of the cause is simply Herceptin, I think there was a bit of anxiety about the future underneath. So I have worked with a skilled EFT practictioner to get to the bottom of things.
I am still doig acupuncture weekly and that is going really well.
I have planned a holiday (more to come about this) and am looking forward to this. When I return, I will move house and then…fingers crossed, I’ll be ready to start looking for part time work.
My friend Philippa gave me the best advice when I was diagnosed. She said something like this “treat bc as a job, then recovery as a job. Then have a holiday before starting work again. Time off work for cancer treatement is not a holiday”. I feel happy with taking this approach and it will be great to have a proper holiday and end the year on a high note before getting back into the economy.