Happy new year!
Well, I have been working for around three weeks now. I am doing 3.5 days per week. It is good overall but I have been having quite a few headaches, migraines and lately, quite oddly, my hair has been falling out. I am sure the hair issue is related to all the changes plus I still have chemo damaged hair. But I do need to get to my GP and get that checked out.
I am finding it harder to meet all my health goals e.g. exercise daily and fit in all the things that I was doing before. Overall, it is a huge transition for me. However, I’m lucky that I’m able to even think about working and have the opportunity to do it and part time hours too.
It is nice to see the old colleagues and it kind of feels like I haven’t been away.
But on the other hand, life has moved on a lot and I do feel a bit like I’m in a parallel universe. People talk about their new jobs and projects…and then I remember why I wasn’t moving along the career ladder; that’s right, I’m recovering from an illness. I feel like I’m a different person now and going back so to speak feels a bit odd. I have to accept that nearly three years of breast cancer treatment in the last five and half years or so – has changed me – in a good way. I can’t go back to the life I had before exactly as it doesn’t fit.
I am enjoying working in a team again, having more structure in my day and using my brain a bit more. I have had to learn new systems and processes and I am getting there.
I haven’t completely assimilated being a part timer. I am not ill but I am not moving at 100km per hour. I am in somewhere in the middle – needing to take things a bit easier. I am not really that good at this and seem to be overdoing it a bit. Hence the headaches and migraines. But hey, I am doing okay.
A part of me is a bit worried about slipping back into the same life as before – when the same life as before generated an environment for breast cancer to grow two times. I need to watch that I don’t get over-tired, stressed and that I am feeling healthy. But I am tired and finding less time to do my self care regime….so it will be interesting to see what I do next.
Oh and I’ve lost 11kg now…just I think from finishing treatment and being more active (and needing less treat-food because I feel better).
It is my birthday tomorrow. I will be 45! My how life goes fast. It’s so important to utilise time how we want it to be used.
What is helping me:
- Still walking or cycling most days
- Acupuncture weekly
- Taking my herbs and supplements
- Eating really well
- Support from friends and family
- Lots of rest and sleep
- Doing things for fun
- Taking things very gently and slowly
- Writing and BC Nirvana
p.s. let me know how you felt going back to work or another situation post-treatment. How did you feel?